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Defining Joy

Posted by on May 7, 2018

Joy is an interesting hmmm…not sure what noun to use here…endeavor? gift? emotion?  Really, maybe I should scrap this topic and choose something else, because now that I’m thinking about it, I’m not at all sure what joy is.  My Merriam-Webster says it is “happiness that comes from success, good fortune, or a sense of well-being” and it adds, bliss, delight, pleasure.  When I admit it, that has been my personal definition of joy for quite some time:  happy, smiling, laughing, easy-not worried.  This has created trouble for me internally lately because the fruits of the spirit include joy.  So, if I’m not feeling it, does that mean I am not producing those fruits?  Is the Holy Spirit silent within me? If so, why?

Our pastor’s sermon yesterday was about “understanding God’s love”. His main point was that sometimes God disciplines us (Hebrews 12:7-11), and that when that happens, it’s a hard time.  He described that time of discipline as ‘grievous’, a time that doesn’t include happiness or joy. It’s taken me the time since the service ended to ponder this question of discipline and joy, and I’ve had a couple of aha! thoughts.

When our daughter was in high school, her creative, fiery, ebullient, beautiful, independence sometimes got her in trouble with her mom.  The end result would be grounding.  Now grounding is a funny punishment, because it confines the angry miscreant to close quarters with the exasperated judge/ jury.  At first, she’d be silent and angry, but something really interesting always happened soon after she’d begun serving her sentence: she’d relax and begin to enjoy the time she was forced to spend with me, with us.  We’d watch a movie together, play monopoly, talk, make meals. I spent time wondering about this phenomenon and finally concluded that as a teen, the choices and pressures of the world were probably pretty overwhelming for her.  By grounding her, she was forced away from those pressures and for a moment tucked safely out of their reach.  She was always happy to rejoin the outside world after her time was up, but the duration was a respite, a reminder that she was loved and protected (even from herself) by the arms and love of her parents.

So, back to God’s discipline.  I’m not convinced that God makes bad things happen to us in order to teach us something.  But, I am certain that when life deals out hard times, God is there to help us learn from our mistakes, grow as a result of the pain, and simply endure the trials of this world.  It’s easy to get caught up in those trials and see only the trouble, feel the pain, walk the floor on sleepless nights, struggle through the worry and uncertainty.  It’s easy to lose our happiness, misplace our delight, forget what it feels like to relax.

Something I read recently in the context of the fruits of the spirit defined joy as “the exuberance for life”.  This impressed me when I read it because there was no mention of smiling, or laughter, or happiness as we usually think of it.  What if joy isn’t simply the presence of merriment and frivolity?  What if the definition of true joy includes a deep enthusiasm and passion for life itself?  Lots of things then can become clear and much easier.  Philippians 4 tells us to rejoice in the Lord always.  James 1 claims that we should consider trials and trouble as pure joy.  Before, I’ve struggled with those two admonitions because I just don’t feel like dancing with all my might when my stomach is tied in knots or I’m not sure how to resolve the worries I’m facing.  But I can (and do!) maintain my zeal for life.  I can enjoy the safety and security of knowing that even in hard times, through pain and sadness, God is there with me, just like I shared in being grounded with my daughter.  Okay.  Yes. I can see this new definition of joy behind the pain and sorrow.  And, I can rejoice in that.  Always.

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