People watching is a popular and usually fun pastime. It’s a habit I partake in and often enjoy. Walking through the mall, waiting in an airport, relaxing in a park. People are such varied and sundry creatures. It’s fun to notice the choices people make with their appearance and demeanor. I smile watching two people enjoying each other’s company (within reason!), I love seeing children sleeping without care in horrible positions in strollers or, better yet, on a parent’s shoulder, totally oblivious to the noise and commotion around them. (I envy their ability to sleep so peacefully in the hub-bub.) I chuckle warmly at the fashion choices of little old men in plaid paints and striped shirts or those of carefree little girls dressed in rain boots and tutus. (And I often wish I weren’t so constrained by society’s norms so that I could wear a pink feather boa sometimes!) I especially love airports, watching loved ones reunited. Hugs and tears and smiles speak so loudly of how precious each is to the other.
But…people watching is also a dangerous game. The danger of course, is being judgmental and critical. We don’t stop at just noticing, we pass judgement – and not just on the look but on the inner person as well. “That girl is too heavy for that outfit, doesn’t she understand diets?…He’s a terrible father to talk to those kids like that…Doesn’t she know that she’s wearing too much makeup?…He must be lazy since he’s so unkempt…that man is wearing a MAGA hat, let’s harass him!” It’s so easy to compare and be condemnatory. I hate to admit that I partake in this negative side, too, sometimes. While I have a small tattoo, I don’t admire necks or entire arms that are inked. I have three holes in my ears, but ears with those big hollow rings in them don’t attract me. We laugh at websites that show non-conforming customers at Wal-Mar- there are entire websites showcases these individuals. I truly try not to engage in this kind of people watching. Not because there aren’t shocking or worrisome people in public, but because I know in my depths that looking at others from a pedestal of my own making is treacherous territory.
People watching with the goal of celebrating the infinite variety of folks is fun, any other motive is hurtful, to me and to others whether they are ever aware of it or not. How do I rein myself in and curtail my tendency for mean spirited people watching? I try to watch myself from other’s perspective: I’m certain that the fact that I DO have a tattoo is cause for judgment from some, or that I DO have my ears pierced several times, or that I DO wear jeans and t-shirts when the fashion police have decreed that women over 55 shouldn’t wear jeans (What? You’d rather I wear polyester pants with elastic waists pulled up a little too high? Brrr, just the thought makes me shiver. Euww!) I’m not saying that I make decisions based on what the current fashion trends are, and I certainly don’t feel like I need to curtail my First Amendment rights to be me through the expression of my clothes. Tangent: I’ve never been too subject to that…When they were in high school my children were a little chagrined (to say the least) that I often wore dresses with colored or patterned ankle socks and tennies. More than once one of them commented to me , “Mom, you are a fashion statement, and that statement is, ‘I am a dork!’”) Anyway, what I am saying is that as a follower of Jesus, I do have a responsibility to represent myself and my God well when I’m in public.
So, carefully, I’m going to keep people watching, continuing to celebrate that God made us all so differently. Maybe I’ll also whisper a prayer when someone walks by who displays something worrisome (Like the pretty young woman at the Frontier Days concert this week weaving as she walked while she held a can of Coors Lite in each hand.) But more than that, I’m going to watch myself to make sure that I’m being someone worth watching.
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